Yesterday I had to once again evaluate my feelings about living in community. I will claim that we should endeavor to live our lives in a way that the people around us uphold one another in every aspect of life. This would mean, in theory, that I believe that we should call attention, gently and with our neighbor’s best at heart, to things that others around us need to change.
This is an easy enough sentiment when I perceive others as needing that corrective intervention, maybe it is not as easy when it is I receiving the corrective. I will admit that I used to have trouble with anything that could even potentially be viewed as criticism, and that I still have to work at not taking things too personally, or thinking that that voiced concern takes away all the good that there is. Yet, I also have to recognize that I have become much better about this. I have also learned that I can evaluate what others say and take it or leave it, in short I realize that other peoples’ opinions are just that and are not necessarily better or worse than mine.
But what about the larger community in which we live? The community that lies beyond family, friends, school, work, church, etc? I have always felt, or at least thought I felt, that the idea of community with certain boundaries of course, was just as needed.
That was until yesterday. Yesterday I was driving along Lake Street in Minneapolis just enjoying the beautiful spring day. As I stopped at a red light a car came up beside me and honked repeatedly, then fervently motioned for me to lower my window.
With his angry eyes blazing he yells, “You have no brake lights. None.”
Completely taken aback by his manner I simply looked at him with wide eyes and rather lamely said, “Oh. Okay.”
“Humph. YOU HAVE NO BRAKE LIGHTS!!” He yelled again, obviously impatient with my lack of immediate action.
“Okay. Thanks.” I could think of nothing else to say at that moment with him continuing to glare at me. Of course the second the light turned green and he squealed through a left turn, I thought of several witty comebacks from, ‘Thank you very much Mr. Sunshine,’ to, ‘Oh let me pull my magic wand out and just fix that right up.’ I mean seriously, my mind continued on. What did he expect? How would I know that my brake lights were out? They were working the last time I stood behind my car. It was just in for a bunch of little repairs during which time they check that stuff. And what did he expect me to do about it right now, here in the middle of the street? The big jerk. And yes, let us pretend that I am that nice during my internal rants.
All through this tirade in my head there was a quiet little voice just waiting to be heard. This is just part of living in community. Conscience? Spirit-led thought? Rationality?
And this is what I want to help build?
He is just a concerned neighbor, doing his best to protect his community. Isn’t that what you believe we all are called to do? Ugh. Don’t you hate it when your own principles and ethics come back to interfere in your life?
I do believe that. I do think we should act on that value, holding each life around us as valuable and a beloved part of God’s creation. This man was doing that. Or at least there was an attempt there. Yes his delivery was harsh, extremely harsh. However he sought to let me know of a potential risk to myself and others. Who knows how long this problem has existed, and no one else has brought it to my attention.
What about next year when I am working in ministry setting that includes 5 small congregations, working out of a town of about 5500 and living in a town of about 100? I am of course not at all familiar with small towns, but I am pretty sure that I will get a whole new perspective on community and what it means to hold one another accountable.
Community is messy because it involves people and their human natures. This leads to misunderstandings, misinterpreted communication, and even sometimes just a basic clash of personalities. What a disaster. What a potential land-mine of problems. What a beautiful expression of imperfect, often misguided, sinful persons all holding onto the wonderful promise of being redeemed and reconciled to God and to each other through Christ.
Welcome to the world of community, Tina, hold on for the wild ride.
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